October 13, 2024 — Episode #41

Jerry and Becky Drace explain why a shared sense of humor is one of the best tools for building a strong marriage and family, using laughter, funny memories, and hard science to make their case.

Drawing from a chapter of Jerry’s book “44 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage,” they distinguish healthy humor that builds closeness from hurtful humor that wounds a spouse and creates distance. Becky shares research on how genuine laughter lowers stress, boosts immune function, and even lowers blood pressure, while Jerry cites Proverbs 17:22, “a merry heart does good like medicine.” The couple swap favorite family memories, including their son dropping the offering plate as a boy in a packed church and their daughter tumbling into a swimming pool in her new Easter dress, and they recommend building family traditions around clean, funny movies everyone can laugh at together. They close by encouraging families to bring more cheerfulness into the home and into everyday encounters with others.

Topics discussed:

• Chapter 40 of “44 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage”: healthy humor
• Medical and health benefits of laughter
• The difference between playful humor and hurtful mockery
• Funny family memories involving their children
• Choosing wholesome family movies and games together
• Becky’s new book, “The Bright Side of Blue”
• Proverbs 17:22 and Ephesians 5:19-20 on joy and thankfulness

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October 6, 2024 — Episode #40

Continuing last week’s conversation on finances, Jerry and Becky Drace ask a simple question with a complicated answer: what can money actually buy, and what can it never buy?

They offer a practical, percentage-based approach to budgeting — tithing, savings, housing, food, and debt repayment — and run through a list of things no amount of money can purchase, including peace, health, respect, and salvation. Drawing on the Apostle Paul’s example of contentment, they warn against comparing your family’s finances to others’, including celebrity marriages that look wealthy but are often empty, and share a story about a wealthy man’s wife who longed for the presence of God in her home more than anything money could buy.

Topics discussed:

• What true wealth means versus material riches
• A practical percentage-based budgeting guide
• Contentment and the Apostle Paul’s example
• Things money cannot buy: peace, health, respect, and salvation
• Avoiding comparison with others’ finances or celebrity marriages
• Proverbs 11:24 and Matthew 6:19-21
• Praying for wisdom over financial decisions

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September 29, 2024 — Episode #39

Jerry and Becky Drace tackle one of the most contentious topics in any marriage — money — and how financial dishonesty or overspending can quietly tear a family apart.

They open with the story of a young, high-earning couple, an attorney and a fashion designer, whose two-year marriage collapsed under the weight of financial conflict despite a top-tier income. From there they cite sobering statistics on average American credit card and household debt, argue against spouses keeping separate bank accounts, and describe the toll of harassing calls from debt collectors. The conversation turns to tithing and stewardship as a foundation for financial peace, and closes with the announcement of Becky’s newly released book, “The Bright Side of Blue.”

Topics discussed:

• How financial stress and debt destroy marriages regardless of income
• Average American credit card and household debt statistics
• Why separate “his and hers” bank accounts can undermine unity
• Dealing with debt collectors and financial pressure
• Tithing and biblical stewardship
• Proverbs 3:9-10 and Malachi 3:10
• Teaching children financial responsibility with their own checking accounts

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September 22, 2024 — Episode #38

Picking up on the previous week’s conversation about caring for aging parents, Jerry and Becky Drace turn to a different kind of stubbornness — the difference between standing firm on conviction and letting pride take over a marriage.

They discuss the practical and emotional weight of caring for aging in-laws facing dementia or Parkinson’s, then pivot to contrasting healthy conviction with prideful stubbornness, using examples from faith and politics. Jerry recalls meeting a world-renowned evangelist known for his humility, and contrasts it with a proud young minister who couldn’t stop scanning the room for someone more important to talk to. Becky reflects on her own grandmother-in-law’s quiet, humble spirit, and the couple describes how simply asking someone “how can I pray for you?” has opened doors with strangers.

Topics discussed:

• Caring for aging parents and in-laws through declining health
• The difference between godly conviction and prideful stubbornness
• Characteristics of pride versus humility
• A story about meeting a widely admired, humble evangelist
• Asking others “how can I pray for you?”
• James 5:19-20 and 2 Corinthians 2
• How pride quietly undermines a marriage’s foundation

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September 15, 2024 — Episode #37

Jerry and Becky Drace ask what actually comes first in a marriage — faith, spouse, children, or career — and how to keep those priorities from quietly sliding out of order.

They open with the importance of both spouses sharing the same relationship with Christ before marriage, warning against being “unequally yoked,” then offer practical habits for staying grounded: morning devotions, praying briefly over children before they leave for school, and a simple formula of dialogue daily, dates weekly, and getting away together quarterly. They also discuss how vocational choices, financial pressure, and pursuing further education can shift a family’s priorities, using their own son’s online graduate studies and his wife’s demanding nursing career as an example.

Topics discussed:

• Building a marriage on a shared relationship with Christ
• Being “unequally yoked” in faith with a spouse
• Praying briefly over children before school
• A formula for staying connected: dialogue daily, date weekly, depart quarterly
• How vocational and financial choices can shift a couple’s priorities
• Avoiding excessive credit card debt as a young couple
• Matthew 6:33

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September 8, 2024 — Episode #36

Jerry and Becky Drace ask how a couple keeps their marriage healthy when a demanding job is pulling at their time and energy.

They talk about the guilt many working mothers feel about time away from their children, and challenge listeners to choose work that fits a calling rather than chasing status. Jerry shares a hard story about a pastor who built a large, prestigious church while his own family quietly fell apart, coming home one day to find his wife and children gone for good, and another about a teenage girl who asked him to check in on her workaholic pastor-father. The couple encourages compartmentalizing work stress so it doesn’t spill into family time.

Topics discussed:

• Balancing a demanding career with a healthy marriage
• Guilt many working mothers feel about time away from family
• Choosing work aligned with calling rather than status or success
• A cautionary story about a pastor who lost his family to ministry demands
• Compartmentalizing work stress at home
• High-profile careers and their toll on families
• Proverbs 13:7 and Mark 8:36

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September 1, 2024 — Episode #35

Content note: includes a brief, non-graphic anecdote about a father’s pornography use being discovered by his daughter, used as an illustration of lost integrity.

Jerry and Becky Drace unpack what it means to be a person of integrity in a marriage — and why encouraging your spouse to grow, rather than feeling threatened by it, is itself a mark of character.

Becky shares her own story of returning to college in her late fifties, encouraged by their son, and earning both a bachelor’s and master’s degree. From there they discuss integrity as something built gradually, like an icicle formed drop by drop, and how possessions can expose rather than build character — including a story about a bank vault worker who watched wealthy clients handle their riches. They also discuss a difficult account of a daughter discovering her father’s secret struggle with pornography, and how compromised integrity in one area of life inevitably affects a family.

Topics discussed:

• Becky’s story of returning to college in her fifties
• Defining integrity as a character trait built over time
• How wealth and possessions can expose a person’s true character
• A father’s loss of integrity and its impact on his daughter
• Encouraging a spouse’s spiritual growth without pressuring them
• Philippians 4:8 and Proverbs 20:7
• Standing firm for what’s right, even alone

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August 25, 2024 — Episode #34

Jerry and Becky Drace look at why saying “thank you” so often fades the longer a couple is married — and why an attitude of gratitude has to be practiced on purpose.

They trace how Hope for the Home began out of a meeting decades ago about ministering to families, then turn to gratitude itself: modeling good manners for children and grandchildren, expressing thanks silently through a touch or a glance, and remembering what first attracted you to your spouse. Becky reflects on the gratitude she developed for Jerry’s support during her cancer treatment a few years earlier, and the couple encourages listeners to notice and voice appreciation for the small, everyday things a spouse does.

Topics discussed:

• The origins of the Hope for the Home ministry
• Teaching children and grandchildren gratitude and good manners
• How gratitude quietly fades over long marriages
• Non-verbal ways of expressing thankfulness
• Supporting a spouse through a health crisis
• The story of the ten lepers and Ephesians 5:20
• Remembering what first attracted you to your spouse

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August 18, 2024 — Episode #33

Content note: this episode discusses domestic abuse at length, including physical, emotional, economic, spiritual, and briefly sexual abuse, and shares a national abuse hotline number.

Jerry and Becky Drace explore why couples pick fights in the first place — and how the need to always be right or in control can be an early warning sign of abuse.

They discuss how power struggles, going back to Adam and Eve and to Cain and Abel, show up in marriages as spiritual, physical, or emotional bids for control, and how patterns of aggression are often inherited from the home someone grew up in. They walk through five types of abuse — physical, sexual, emotional, economic, and spiritual — describe warning signs to watch for while dating, and share the National Domestic Violence Hotline number for anyone currently in an abusive situation. They close with the picture of a marriage as a three-strand cord, strongest when Christ is the third strand.

Topics discussed:

• Why couples pick fights and the desire for control
• Recognizing patterns of abuse learned in childhood
• Five types of abuse: physical, sexual, emotional, economic, and spiritual
• The National Domestic Violence Hotline
• Warning signs of an aggressive personality while dating
• Proverbs 15:1 and Ephesians 5:29
• The “three-strand cord” picture of a Christ-centered marriage

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August 11, 2024 — Episode #32

Content note: this episode includes a brief, non-graphic mention of a young man’s suicide following a job loss.

Jerry and Becky Drace talk about the tender spots every spouse carries — and why “just joking” about them can do real damage to a marriage.

They discuss how backhanded humor and mockery undermine a spouse’s confidence, and how ignoring or dismissing a partner in conversation communicates the same message. Becky opens up about her own sensitivity around body image, tracing it to family history, while Jerry admits his impatience is his own soft spot. They cover how job loss can devastate a husband’s sense of identity, referencing a recent case where a young man took his life after losing his job, and they list red flags of an inconsiderate spouse: constant criticism, withheld affection, secrecy, and lying. The episode closes on true beauty outlasting physical appearance.

Topics discussed:

• Using humor to mask criticism of a spouse
• Recognizing and respecting a spouse’s sensitive areas
• Body image and family history’s effect on self-esteem
• Job loss and a husband’s sense of self-worth
• Listening well instead of rushing to respond
• Red flags: constant criticism, secrecy, and withheld intimacy
• Proverbs 14:13 and James 3:8

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